Mandy Nolan is a Byron-based comedian.
Mandy Nolan is a Byron-based comedian.

Mandy Nolan finishes the sentence...

LOCAL comedian, author and public speaker Mandy Nolan agreed to play 'finish the sentence' with the Ballina Advocate ahead of her MC gig at the 2014 New Year's Eve Comedy Festival at the Ballina RSL.

The first time I drove a car… I wondered how all the idiot boys I knew at school managed to do it so effortlessly because it was a lot harder than it looked. As I was thinking this, I drove up the embankment and swerved, taking out the bumper bar on a parked car. Mum was really impressed. She said I was a natural.

In maths class I used to … Wish that I'd start bleeding out the eye. Or that I'd vomit. Or be abducted by aliens. Or imagine everyone in the nude. Clearly, I wasn't very good at maths.

My first boyfriend … had a silver tooth and played footy. Seemed perfect as I was conceived in the backseat of a car after my dad's footy grand final.

My New Year's resolution is … to become Prime Minister. I am so not impressed with this one.

In fact, I'm not impressed with any of them. Can anyone spell integrity?

People annoy me when … they say "oh you are a comedian - tell me a joke" like I have to prove my authenticity. When I meet a doctor, I don't go "hey you're a doctor - check my breasts!"


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